In Culver City, they would say that you were dead
A committee would convene to pick your casket from a catalog
The power structure comes to rear its ugly head
But the chorus in the kitchen will be cheering for the underdog
Stay wrong, stay wrong, stay wrong
Don't be frightened by the premises we ponder on the premises
Roll on, roll on, roll on
Antiperspirant is integral to everything we're fighting for tonight
Victoria, Victoria
Victoria, Victoria
So sell yourself a self-effacing alibi
It's a practical alternative to living in the present tense
Consult the experts on assisted suicide
They will bludgeon you with circumstantial, anecdotal evidence
Sixteen, sixteen, sixteen
Now we strain to hear the echoes of the pre-Madonna radio
Stay mean, stay mean, stay mean
'Cause if the girls decide to talk to us, then what will there be left to talk about?
Victoria, Victoria
Victoria, Victoria
Accept the profits and return the pity prize
You'll be sorry when the nation gets a Christmas card from Avalon
The years will teach you not to carp or criticize
Lest you find yourself rewarded with a parcel from the pentagon
And you'll remember from the battle of the bulge
How to preach the ways of history books and save yourself the sabotage
Forsake the glory war and practice to indulge
Just remember to repent before you wrap yourself in camouflage
Victoria, your name is in our hearts
Victoria, will you come home and save us?
Victoria, Victoria
Victoria, Victoria