My toothbrush won't clean o dear Mrs Green
Throw it away, throw it away
My cheese it won't grill o dear Mrs Pill
Turn up the heat, turn up the heat.
And don't be sad, its not that bad
Tomorrow will be better.
My peach it won't squash o dear Mrs Posh
Throw it down, throw it down.
My tummy won't tickle o dear Mrs Pickle
Give it a poke, give it a poke.
My hair it won't grow o dear Mrs Snow
Buy a new wig, buy a new wig.
My eggs will not scramble o dear Mrs Campbell
Try them fried, tried them fried.
My telephone won't ring o dear Mrs Ding
Then get it mended that would be splendid.
My head it won't spin o dear Mrs Pin.
Take it off, take it off
"I have" said Mrs Pin, "but now I can't find it."
Oh ... well when you find your head this time
Just place a smile upon your dial
No don't be sad it's not that bad
Tomorrow will be better.