Painting portraits in my head I'm so devoid of your cadence Color you in hues of red The canvas we created when I felt like a tourist in my own skin Going through the same shit everyday I was growing a garden that would never come to bloom But I can't shake this self-complacent curse And you know that I know that you know that I've been searching for a way out Did you find out that I'm rotting myself to the core? Looming like the smoke in your bedroom A permanent crutch used just to guide us through the freezing cold Exhale and let me go Never feeling whole when you're not home Am I supposed to be alone? Tell myself it's what I need I won't fit into this mold I've had enough of it I've been searching for a way out Did you find out that I'm rotting myself to the core? Looming like the smoke in your bedroom A permanent crutch used just to guide us through the freezing cold I traded change for growth