Two, one, two, three I drink my coffee black I eat my chocolate dark And I throw up a little bit when I see couples in the park Saying, "I love you, babe" She's hopping on his back No, I don't, I don't, I don't I don't love like that I'm drinking day-old wine I spend my nights alone And all these guys are asking If my friends are single and if so If I can hook them up If I'll be their wingman No, I don't, I don't, I don't I don't understand Why bitter ain't sweet Why it's better to be Settle in and settling down Cashing in and selling out Why did everybody get so soft now? Everyone is butterflies and downpour dancing I think I'm the last one standing My shirts are ovеrsized I'm playing '90s grungе And I'ma tell a guy I like him, but that's only if I'm drunk I might take shots real fast, but I take love real slow No, I don't, I don't, I don't I don't know Why bitter ain't sweet Why it's better to be Settle in and settling down Cashing in and selling out Why did everybody get so soft now? Everyone is butterflies and downpour dancing I think I'm the last one standing If I say those three words Damn sure, I'ma mean it If I bring a guy home It's for a damn good reason When I'm walking down the aisle No way I'll repeat it Tell me why Tell me why Tell me why Why bitter ain't sweet (ain't sweet) Why it's better to be Settle in and settling down Cashing in and selling out Why did everybody get so soft now? Everyone is butterflies and downpour dancing I think I'm the last one standing Everyone is trading hickeys For the Hamptons Maybe I'm the last one standing