I sat down and turned on my phone like usual And I came to the conclusion that I was not loved The signs were all there but I was too naive And hoped for some mercy from up above But when I waited months and months and nothing came My belief started a steady decline And the sound of the TV overpowered the air And that light in my head ceased to shine Everyone else seemed so oblivious But that just made me more paranoid It's all an act, that's what I told myself So then I consciously began to avoid The very people that told me anything was possible That I'd go far and they would buy my sound But I waited months and months and nothing came And I was too scared to ask around I guess it's a good thing because they inspired me to write this Even though I need to lie to them now But that's what I've been put through all my life And this is my karma somehow And I walk on the road, look at the grass on the sides Somewhere in the world it's just about the time To think about things and promptly gather my mind Because it's about the sudden stop, it's not about the decline Don't look at me I'm not ready Don't talk to me I might break Don't say anything it hurts me Don't do anything that would take effort Please look at me I'm trying so hard Please talk to me I'm in need Please say something I'm going crazy Please do something it's not me It's not me, that's not you Who is who, I'm so confused I look in the mirror and the glass looks back My sight is broken in this static attack Please don't leave me here Please don't not invite me Even if I can't come I'd appreciate it Please don't don't please please do DON'T I'm sitting on the couch and it's 1:14 Maybe this is one of my turns it seems The wall seems to be closing on me My virtual friends would probably agree Sitting here reading mindless shit about barbeques And feeding drugs to different rodents for science Maybe I should have went the path 1st grade me used With that microscope and lab coat and the brain that I had Had is the word that I'm focusing on Remember the friends the friends that I had Maybe I rely on people too much and too much is bad And that's a factor in why I'm always sad I'm rhyming like a damn troglodyte Maybe I shouldn't rhyme the words at all Maybe I just shouldn't talk at all But that was a rhyme, but that doesn't really count Don't look at me I'm not ready Don't talk to me I might break Don't say anything it hurts me Don't do anything that would take effort Please look at me I'm trying so hard Please talk to me I'm in need Please say something I'm going crazy Please do something it's not me Please do something Please I said the magic word and nothing happened I said the magic word and nothing happened I said the magic word and nothing happened I said the magic word and nothing happened Magic isn't real I'm not real You're not real I'm trying to be real I'm not trying that hard though I'm trying so hard though You're not trying at all though I'm not trying at all though I don't understand why people want to be animals It seems like a childish thing to do But I just remembered I'm writing a song about my sadness So that probably beats it out by a little It's right at this moment I see how pathetic this is And how pathetic you are and how pathetic I am And I'm being such an annoying teenager holy shit I used to think being self aware was cool and funny but in reality it's really taxing To hear a grown man or a small boy talk about how he's not smart but he is It's not ironic or entertaining Different strokes for different folks Coherency is out the window Mindless rants oh yeah You can go to school today and you can get a job later You can punch into your job and you can go to the movies later You can go see a movie and you can think about life later You can think of anything you want hopefully never later Please look at me I've stopped trying Please talk to me or don't if you don't want Please say something I'll be here if you do I'll always be here except when I'm not But when am I ever not