I don't know who I've become but everybody seems to love him
He ain't like the dude I know with a busted nose and bleeding knuckles
Homie moving with a purpose
Homie got a dream a hustle
Homie tried to dig a ditch and bury all my deepest struggles
I give him an A for effort
But he ain't know no better
That trauma rose up from the dirt and made shit worse
Growing up I knew my family had a curse
And homie gave me hope that somehow it could be reversed
I got to conquer these demons first
Because now I know what really made me tough
Why I was selling fentanyl to stack my paper up
Why every time I wasn't writing or performing
Being dormant
I was fighting with my thoughts
It was torment
My name is Byron Horton
A survivor at all costs
Them thoughts of murder came from what I seen and who I lost
That fear of going broke is cause I know my family fought
Poverty was man made
Ignorance was taught
Lusting because my cousin touched me early on
Commitment conflicted cause my daddy did me wrong
Up and left
Momma did her best
She didn't communicate because
You can't when you're that stressed
Or maybe nobody taught her and therefore she couldn't teach
Maybe that's why she cussed me out or I'd just get my ass beat
Compassion is a stranger
Affection is unknown
That's why when wifey wants to talk
I got to check my tone
The reason why I shut down
I don't know how to feel
Hoping I never prank out
Somebody might get killed
This image I'm upholding is heroic but unreal
Keep running from my truth then how I ever plan to heal
Demolish then rebuild
You don't have to sell your soul
To lose it
Said I was trapping for some dollars to invest in music
That wasn't true
It was partially fueled by influence
I just adjusted to my ghetto and what they was doing
Spend 20 years around the plug and eventually you'll use it
I plugged my thugs with the drugs a few of them used it
Broke my heart they was fiending instead of stinging
And now I'm realizing all the damage I was wreaking
I was talking to my therapist and shit
And I was
Trying to figure out why I felt so lonely
With all of these fans and supporters
People looking up to me and I realized
You know when I made the alias Skypp
When I made the person y'all know as Skypp
I abandoned Byron
Which is who I was for the first 13 or 14 years of my life
You know what I mean
It was a lot of shit Byron didn't get to experience
Byron didn't get to mature from
So in a sense Byron is still that thirteen or fourteen year old kid
Just abandoned and lonely you know what I mean so
I had to address that shit
And when I did I thought Byron was the bad guy
Because he was on some street shit
But really he had the same goal as Skypp
Which was making it out the struggle
You know what I mean so
My only job really was to find that balance and
Bring Byron up to speed with what Skypp had going on
And just try to blend that shit together and make it work for me man
So to everybody I love everybody I hurt
Sorry for my trauma