I remember I was eight years old
When I broke my leg and you carried me back home
I remember every Christmas
We would eat dinner, then open presents and play in the snow
We would often watch movies
At least once a week
Then go outside and have a ball
I remember every laughter in perfect harmony
That I will carry with my soul
Those were good times, you know
But I can barely comprehend
Why you would hurt me like that
I was just a child
I looked up to you
You were my idol
It broke my heart when you said
You didn't remember the mental scars you gave me
But I still choose to cherish the happy memories
But it's easier said than done
I miss you sometimes, but what you did was wrong
You can't take it back
But I'm finally on the road of forgiveness
These are the words I'll never say out loud
These are the words that will never leave my mouth
I just had to write them down for myself
These are the words I'll never say out loud
These are the words I'll never say out loud
These are the words that will never leave my mouth
I just had to write them down for myself
These are the words I'll never say out loud
I still remember the physical pain
The nausea and the fear of you touching me
My confidence being shattered
I went to school and I felt like I didn't even matter
I still carry deep insecurities and in full honesty
I often dislike the person staring back at me
And even though I've found some peace within me
It doesn't mean that I don't feel the pain you caused me
Sometimes it's difficult to flip the switch
And take back control
I sometimes hear that mean voice in my head
But on good days I beat the hell out of that nasty bitch
These are the words I'll never say out loud
These are the words that will never leave my mouth
I just had to write them down for myself
These are the words I'll never say out loud
These are the words I'll never say out loud
These are the words that will never leave my mouth
I just had to write them down for myself
These are the words I'll never say out loud
I will never forget the pain
When you said that I was to blame
For the abuse I endured from you
I thought you felt sorry for what you put me through
For all those years I protected you
I wasted all those years in silence
Bawling my eyes out in secret
When you don't even feel shit
You don't feel anything
You're as cold and dry as a frozen dead cunt
You only feel sorry you got caught
You only care about one thing and that's your own fucking self
You've never cared for anybody else
Oops, I just said it out loud
These are the words and I just said them out loud
Damn it feels good to just let it all out
I'm singing this for myself
From now on, I'm gonna say it out loud
These are the words and I said them out loud
Damn it feels good to just let it all out
I wrote this song for myself, but I wrote it for you as well
So say it out loud
Say it out loud
Say it out loud
Say it out loud