I smoke cigarettes
Because I got a problem
With my mental health
I don't know how to help myself
Don't know how to ask for help
I don't know how to not break myself
Don't wanna see so many sunrises
Because of all the late nights
I know where all the afterparties is
When I'm tired as shit
And I just wanna keep going
And fuck with that blow
And be a different person
That I know I will like
I'm a different person
You see on the outside
On the Instagram
Tryna get a lot of likes
Smoking in this room
When I'm supposed to smoke outside
I'm the one that you thought
Was so good but I couldn't
Make one good decision
Even if I could
Fucked up
So drunk
I got no one to love
I hate myself
And the way I am
I hate myself
And the way I am
Go
I hate myself
I'm trapped inside a system
Lock my heart and hide the key
And know there ain't nobody miss 'em
Got some cringe I call my life
And see as memories
Dodging all my peers
Because I know they're so ahead of me
Lace my blunts with Ketamine
Chase my pills with Hennessey
Dive into the ocean from the bridge
It's feeling heavenly
Died when I was seventeen
Got stood up by Emily
Hate myself much more
Than you could ever know
Or ever be
Jumped to methamphetamines
Can't change a world I'll never see
Weight up on my heart
And man I'm only stuck on
Level three
Still make the same bad decisions
And in my position
I know I should change in my heart
But don't know where to start
I hate myself
Because I make a lot of bad decisions
Then I suffer the consequences
And just live with them
I don't fight
I don't try
I don't hide
I just lie
In my mind
Like it never ever ever happened
It never ever ever happened
Coming up and being happy
It never ever ever happened
I hate myself
And the way I am
I hate myself
And the way I am