I had to put words to it first
To spell out the turmoil inside
This whirlpool of colours
This fragmented rainbow
That I feel that I struggle to hide
From home where I knew who I was
I've run far away and turned strange
I wish you could've met me back then
When I laughed
When I was prism of the sun
And I'm waking every morning with a grown
And I'm starting later every day
I spend a little more than I can spare
What does it matter anyway?
I'm fading colour from the weakening pity
And I will fade out in grey
I have to burn out brightly
I am not the enemy
No mattеr what you think of me
I've wasted so much еnergy
Afraid to grow old without leaving scars on my hands
And if you listen very close
You'll hear all I wanted was the space to make my own way
Gift me back the words that slipped away
Where the hours seem the same
Forgetting every figment I can find
Like sunlight for the blind
Madness in becoming something worth meaning
And I will not die this way
I have to burn out brightly
I am not the enemy
No matter what you think of me
I've wasted so much energy
Afraid to grow old without leaving scars on my hands
And if you listen very close
You'll hear all I wanted was the space to make my own way
How? How can I possibly be happy being me
When every thought is tinged with regret?
Kneel. Gather every piece. Every part of me
Forget the past and build me something real
I can't have all this effort be in vain
I have to burn out brightly
I am not the enemy
No matter what you think of me
I've wasted so much energy
Afraid to grow old without leaving scars on my hands
And if you listen very close
You'll hear all I wanted was the space to face a new day