Drag the lake, Charlie Charlie, drag the lake Lester didn't come home last night And Wanda's all irate Better keep your fingers crossed And hope we find him drowned Wanda's gonna come and kill us all If he shows up in town ♪ Drag the lake, Charlie I heard that he was seen Cavortin' with ol' Shorty Up at the line again Wanda's got that goddamn Pistol in her purse If she goes on the rampage They'll have to call the Hearse Better drag the lake, Charlie Charlie, drag the lake Remember what happened last time When Lester went on the lake? I heard it took the cleaning crew Two weeks to clean the bar They never found that teenage girl They never found the car Drag the lake, Charlie Drag the lake, Charlie It won't be the first time But it might be the last ♪ Drag the lake, Charlie And keep your fingers crossed And if you're friends with Jesus Please ask Him to help us Our best case scenario Is Lester turns up dead I'm almost out of Valium Courage and self-respect ♪ Drag the lake, Charlie (Charlie) Drag the lake, Charlie (Charlie) It won't be the first time But it might be the last