I love my mustard gas (I love my mustard gas) I love it so (I love my mustard gas) But there's things of mustard gas (I love my mustard gas) You ought to know (I love my mustard gas) She keeps some in the bedroom (I love my mustard gas) She keeps some by the phone (I love my mustard gas) A cloud hangs in the bathroom (I love my mustard gas) When she is all alone (I love my mustard gas) She sees the yellow-grey cloud It brings its sickness near She doesn't know quite what it is She's getting the heck outta here Seeps through her polyester Burns in the third degree Her skin is turning black It's getting cold it's getting tough it's getting leathery. (I love my mustard gas) (I love my mustard gas) (I love my mustard gas) (I love my mustard gas) I love my mustard gas (I love my mustard gas) It's so much fun (I love my mustard gas) And you'll love mustard gas by the (I love my mustard gas) Time we're done (I love my mustard gas) Mustard gas is pretty bad for you So keep some in the office and the playground too It buckles skin and it ruins sight It intrudes in my nostrils but it feels alright If you've got blisters and their filled with goo And there's a blood-tinged fluid seeping outta your nose Feeling nauseous and your throat burns too Then it's mustard wreaking havoc over you