This is the greatest song that has ever been made It has really good lyrics and a really cool guitar It took me fifteen minutes to write and record it I know you're very impressed And you wish it was your song Well buddy, I've got a deal for you Please give me all your money and let me hang out with your mom In exchange you can have this song on your [banned word] account I show up at seven sharp, ready to hang with your mom And your dad answers the door and says he's the only one home I said, "that's the next best thing" We stayed up really late He let me drink one whole beer And he tucked me into your bed He read me a bedtime story Told me he's proud of me And right before I passed out, he got really serious and he said "I've got a deal for you Please kill my son and take his place in my house." I said, "ok, dad. whatever you say - I'll do anything for you." Everyone's dad wishes that I was their son As of right now, I have one billion dads They all come to my baseball games And they cheer when I swing my bat at the ball They don't care if I hit, hit the ball or not We're proud of you son We're proud of you son, we're proud of you son! You're so athletic, you're so athletic, you're so athletic! You're a natural, you're a natural, you're a natural! Hey Hey Hey Hey, keep your eye on the ball! That's my boy! Me too! Keep your head held high Keep your head held high, keep your head held high! It's ok buddy, try again! Rome wasn't built in a day Rome wasn't built in a day Rome wasn't built in a day! Thank you, dads All one billion of you I don't care that I had to kill one billion of your sons To earn your love I'd do it again, gladly Ya know? This is a really cool guitar right here And those were some really good lyrics It's safe to say that this is the greatest song ever made If you don't think so, heh, just ask your dad