Found bravery in bottles Before I threw it up And patience in the time it takes to try and sober up Thought if if I could settle down that they would let me off the hook Found out that preacher's daughters aren't the angels that they look Got on the straight and narrow Drove it 90 days Pulled up the drive in time to watch that U-Haul drive away They're making trouble faster Than I can make my bail I won't touch that holy water Till I'm done raising hell Fate is a nice girl But she's got a mean streak So let that thunder roll until it's gone She'll turn a love song Into the Jaws theme And she won't bat an eye To get you satisfied Then soak and set a fire to your throne Found Jesus playin' poker With the devil in my mind He said "I just be the farm, can you come back another time?" And if I don't leave you nothin' Then walk away with this I tried to take the high road And flew right off the cliff Fate is a nice girl But she's got a mean streak So let that thunder roll until it's gone She'll turn a love song Into the Jaws theme And she won't bat an eye To get you satisfied Then soak and set a fire to your throne