I've been preoccupied with Hiding under the sheets When my heart beats Too fast for me to function efficiently I've been preoccupied with Deciding the balance between Despair and self care If I see relief I might be heading there I've been preoccupied with Arriving to work absurdly early And it's been easy since my manager hid your picture I've been preoccupied with Driving far out to see my family They want the best for me And they hate to see me unhappy Thought I was good at love Because I gave and gave more than enough Then ended up untouched So I've been preoccupied with Fighting the urge to stay in bed By playing guitar instead of playing dead. And I've been preoccupied with Swiping every morning So I can find someone to type to Every lonely night And if I'm bad at this, I'm out of practice I was gone for so long And I didn't miss this What did I miss? I've been preoccupied with a good life I've been preoccupied with surviving inside this good life.