The only way
To get what you want
Is to become a human yourself
You can do that?
My dear sweet child
That's what I do
It's what I live for
To help unfortunate merfolk
Like yourself
Poor souls
With no one else to turn to
I admit that in the past
I've been a nasty
They weren't kidding
When they called me
Well, a witch
But you'll find that nowadays
I've mended all my ways
Repented, seen the light
And made a switch
True? Yes
And I fortunately know
A little magic
It's a talent that
I always have possessed
And here lately
Please don't laugh
I use it on behalf
Of the miserable, the lonely
And depressed (pathetic)
Poor unfortunate souls
In pain, in need
That one longing to be thinner
That one wants to get the girl
And do I help them? Yes indeed
Those unfortunate souls
So sad, so true
They come flocking to my cauldron
Crying "Spells, Ursula, please!"
And I help them? Yes I do
Now it's happened once or twice
Someone couldn't pay the price
And I'm afraid
I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals
Yes I've had the odd complaint
But on the whole
I've been a saint
To those poor unfortunate souls
So, have we got a deal?
If I become human
Then I'll never see my father or sisters again
That's right
But you'll have your man
Life's full of tough choices, innit
Oh, and there is one more thing
We haven't discussed the subject of payment
Oh but I don't have any-
I'm not asking much
Just a token really, a trifle
You'll never even miss it
What I want from you is
Your voice
My voice?
You've got it, sweet cakes
No more talking, singing
Zip
But without my voice
How can I-
You'll have your looks
Your pretty face
And don't underestimate
The importance of
Body language, ha!
The men up there
Don't like a lot of blabber
They think a girl who gossips
Is a bore
Yes on land it's much preferred
For ladies not to say a word
And after all, dear
What is idle prattle for?
Come on!
They're not all that impressed
With conversation
True gentlemen avoid it when they can
But they dote and swoon and fawn
On a lady who's withdrawn
It is she who holds her tongue
Who gets the man
Come on
You poor unfortunate soul
Go ahead!
Make your choice!
I'm a very busy woman
And I haven't got all day
It won't cost much
Just your voice!
You poor unfortunate soul
So sad, but true
If you want to cross the bridge
My sweet, you've got the pay the toll
Take a gulp and take a breath
And go ahead and sign the scroll
Flotsam, Jetsam
Now I've got her, boys!
The boss is on a roll
This poor unfortunate soul