A gentleman's got a walking stick. A seaman's got a gaff. And the merry men of Robin Hood They used a quarterstaff. On the Spanish plains inside their canes They hide their ruddy swords. But we make do with an old bam-boo And everyone applauds! Me ol' bam-boo, me ol' bam-boo You'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo. You can have me hat or me bum-ber-shoo But you'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo. When punting on the beautiful Thames You use a sturdy pole. To protect their fair complexion Ladies use a parasol. It's useful in the underbrush To have a hefty spear. Right! But what we do with an old bam-boo Makes everybody cheer! Me ol' bam-boo, me ol' bam-boo You'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo You can have me hat or me bum-ber-shoo But you'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo 'Ere we go, mate . . . A flyer in an air-e-o-plane He steers it with a stick He does? A collier in the pits o' Wales He leans upon his pick That's right! Now every wheel of an automobile Revolves around a shaft (HEY!) But what we do with an old bam-boo Makes every one go daft. And 1 - 2 Me ol' bam-boo, me ol' bam-boo You'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo. You can have me hat or me bum-ber-shoo But you'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo. (Dance break) And a 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - and a 5 and a 6 and a 7 HO! Me ol' bam-boo, me ol' bam-boo You'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo. You can have me hat or me bum-ber-shoo But you'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo. You'd better never bother with me ol' bam-boo!