I think one of your ears is bigger than the other
And you just dropped a pupusa on your nice sundress
You asked me about my grandpa
You laughed when I started to cry
You tell me I look ugly
You tell me I look like my Tio
I like you
My dishwasher hands looked ugly
I looked at my hands
I had water in my socks
I fell asleep on my break
I dreamt of a lot of things
I dreamt of my grandpa
I dreamt I lived in Texas
I dreamt I made my mom proud
Mexican girl
I woke up and rubbed my eyes
My hands were still raisins
I stood up and walked back to the dishes
On my way back there was a young girl my age
Walking on the same side of the street as me, towards me
I crossed the street to the other sidewalk where she wasn't walking
I was scared I was gonna scare her
Why do I write these things
Why am I ever anywhere
You'll hate me if you meet me, I hope I never meet you
It's all in my head, please let me see
I think I feel okay now
But you are all over the sky to me
I think that means I love you
Why do I write these things
Why am I ever anywhere
I'll cut my finger dishwasing and go home 3 hours later
And feel the weight of how mean I really am to myself
And hold it all back
I'm lonely and happiest that way
I hold it back and laid down on my bed and cried harder than I ever cried
That everything just ends up funny
And hope it takes a while to fall asleep
The dark room and my reflection
I get so scared it makes me sick
Banuelos' eyes whispered "I wish you weren't so sad my love"
When she tried to help me
When all I saw was powder brick finger and I never could
The night's warm and raspy and my cut's still wet
I kicked off my dishwasher shoes and thought about my brother and how he always tries his best
My cut's tearing bigger
A bad year in one day
But there's an especially beautiful cricket singing outside my window
When the sun comes up it smells like Mexico
My heart warms up in my raisin hands
NAST