Three encores of, "Oh, Sonny Boy" backed only by accordion Three rows of pale brunettes protect him from the crowd The curtain is a patchwork of imitation vermillion And a red bulb hangs low above the throne that has been found
♪ This is the scene on Main Street when John 50 comes to town Yes, this is the scene on Main Street when John 50 comes to town
Crowds of every age, creed and gender are abound Signor kitsch sings skits detailing each attendees sins First time anteaters lose themselves in the wings With vigour they scratch red spots, overwhelmed by their king ♪ In all the world there's no escape from this infernal din In all the world there's no escape from this infernal din Children of Bethlehem, come all boys and girls Come, listen to these, my eternal words Judge not who you see by whatever they may say But by their round eyes, lips, ears and curves A man is his country, your country is you All bad is forewarned, all good will come true These words are heard on Main Street when John 50 comes to town Yes, these words are heard on Main Street when John 50 comes to town ♪ This garbling non-song whips throng into frenzy The echoes of his crooning now cease to be heard No-longer-pale brunettes are broken in two And thrown to the snouts of the anteater crew John 50 is in tatters His soapbox usurped His torn robes adorn the tree stumps of earth No hack with an army Will last long before he Breeds men who yearn For their own bloody glory ♪ That was the scene on Main Street when John 50 came to town Yes, that was the scene on Main Street when John 50 came to town