Sell us a president, agency man Smiling Big Brother, stern father perhaps Sell us a president, agency man A gay smiling nothing we know never craps Let's try California, (Pay us first before we do it!) We'll get a smiling nazi And march him right on through it Rent a baby, kiss a baby Ladies in for tea And here's a bunch of speeches We'll toss them in for free Sell us a president, agency man Smiling Big Brother, stern father perhaps Sell us a president, agency man A gay smiling nothing we know never craps We'll sell him in the movies On the tube throughout the year We'll sell him by the buckets To the Okies drinking beer We'll teach him how to walk and talk We'll putty up his chin We'll print his picture everywhere Of course the SCHMUCK will win From the heart of old Death Valley To the ruling of our land A simple trick, you simple pigs Just the way we planned