Loaded to brim with Librium
Hallucinating in some retro tele nova
Just using worse drugs to quit the drugs
I've been using to stay comfortably numb
Used to be I'd drink myself through every twist and turn
But now I've grown up
A bit
And seen some shit
Made my mistakes
I've lost and won
What did I learn?
♪
Holy shit I'm not dependent anymore
It's fucking weird
I've been an addict for a decade
Now I can see the world so clearly
And it's terrifying
My mind feels rejuvenated
All those thoughts I drowned out
For so long are bubbling back up
And they're driving me crazy
Oh, look now I can feel again
The numbness has evaded
How real life it's fine and dandy
No, it's not I fucking hate this
Is this really how all these sober people live
Life sober is over stimulating
Piece of shit
This feelings hell and boring normalcy
Why did I even quit?
Oh yeah that's right, I almost died
So I suppose I'll give this sober train a ride
At least until I yank out all my teeth
Does this boredom never cease?
Reality is a disease
Oh lord, I need a fucking drink
♪
I sit in slippers on a dog hair coated sofa
Staring at the ceiling contemplating God
Why I numb myself and what I'm so afraid of
All while I trying to ignore these racing thoughts
I've a never-ending nagging need to figure out the point
Or maybe there just isn't one
We're all just maladroit
Moronic meaningless abominations
Hurdling towards an empty everlasting blank oblivion
The clarity is killing me
But so were the drugs
Why can I not just exist happily
Without being numb?
Is there something I'm missing
Which others have found?
If you've answers inform me
I'm being drug down by the weight of unknowing
It's really bummin' me out
I've been to hell and back
And seen so much
Beneath the heavens
So what did I learn?
♪
Left to my own devices
And stripped of all my vices
I possess a tendency
To overthink and analyze things
But I don't think it worthless
To contemplate our purpose
Now that our society
Appears to have become so thoughtless
It seems especially important
That we take a sec to gather some perspective
And remember that we're all just specs
Of dust within a vast expanse
Created out of happenstance
Diluted from the same initial spark
So let's party down