In a larval state Drinking a minimum wage I fell in with a girl so vastly superior She wore Mardi Gras beads in her hair And I just can't get her out of my bed Wish I'd gone with her sister instead Love life imploded My dice were all loaded Can't get her out of my bed I know If she gave a fuck then it would show And she wouldn't have me stabbing other boys Like it's just a bit of sweetness she enjoys Devil's daughter So much for Simon's "50 Ways" What can a lonely boy do when all else seems inferior No come-along will pull me away And I just can't get her out of my bed Should've mainlined saltpeter instead My vices have voted, her ass duly noted Can't kick her out of my bed Hold on, maybe this girl is alright Just wants the benefit of a modern love life And I don't know the difference anymore I've turned making bad decisions into some kind of art form Don't mention boundaries on the phone They slide and glide on out the door Can't get her out of my bed Can't get her out of my bed My vices have voted, her ass duly noted Can't get her out of my bed Slow down I don't know what I'm hoping for So finally I'm opening the latch I swear she'll be the last one I dispatch