"Napkins"?!? That's his name? Look at those black thick plastic glasses frames Get a load of him bustin' raps With his goofy-ass hair And his Western shirts with the button snaps He oughta keep his food chute shut Rhymin' in his H&M denims with the boot cut From his feet, to his head That dude doesn't have any street cred Street cred... I don't have a lot of street cred... And I don't think that it's a secret... It's clear I'm not a hard MC With S T R E E T C R E D It can be difficult hip-hop singing When you didn't have a typical rap upbringing I never sold coke or PCP. I Moved fro-yo at the TCBY Never shot a proper gun Just the Nintendo Duck Hunt one And a Super Soaker water gun. The Crip gang? I wasn't in it, dog Just the youth group at my synagogue Yeah Thugged out? Not even close. Cub scouts. Webelos! I didn't battle like 8 Mile. Oh, I competed But high school team debate style Never wrote no graffiti! Just thank you notes, for gifts on my b-day! Prob'ly should have gone pre-med Instead I'm an MC without a shred of Street cred... I was not a little street kid... No, I was wholesome like whole wheat bread... And now I rock the party With no S T R E E T C R E D I can't pop like a zit can I can't lock like a kickstand But in fifth grade, I played Tevye And danced and lip synched To "If I Were A Rich Man" (Raise the roof!) And I got to tell ya: My beat box? Not stellar. But I did do vocal percussion In college a cappella. Did I ever rob a store? No. I did once shoplift a soft-core porno mag From a news stand at the airport I was scared I'd be sent off to jail for it But do you think that they caught me And threw me in juvie? Not me! I got away scot-free! My face would have been beet red But at least with a jail bid I'd have had a little bit of Street cred! I am not a foolish meathead! And I'm also not conceited... I know that there's no part of me With S T R E E T C R E D! Street cred, oooh Jim jim jow a jim a jang jow Street cred, oooh! Ahh, ahh... Streeet cred, oooh Dim dim dim dim dim dim dim. Street cred, ooooh Yabba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dibba dum Bum bum!