The family's in a feud
The tree's a tinderbox
Mother's in a mood
It's Christmas on the rocks
The goose is overcooked
The world is overwrought
God is overbooked
It's Christmas on the rocks
But still we aim to fill our spirits to the brim
Praise the lord and pass the scotch
A brandy's handy when the world is looking grim
Yes it's Christmas on the rocks
Brother's in a brood
Sister's on the sauce
Father's getting stewed
It's Christmas on the rocks
And yet we'll never fret for want of alcohol
Hallelujah have some schnapps
My friend a bourbon is the greatest gift of all
When it's Christmas on the rocks
Baby please come home
Home is where the heartache is
But home is where the hard stuff is
'Tis the season to be home
Tidings unto you
Let's skip the parting shots
I've got the whisky flu
Another Christmas on the rocks
And though we'll ne'er say no to friends or alcohol
Come next year I got some thoughts
To each must I beseech bring only Tylenol
If it's Christmas on the rocks
Yes it's Christmas on the rocks
When it's Christmas on the rocks
I'll have a Christmas on the rocks