Last Friday night I was due out on a date But unfortunately I got home really late I didn't have time for a bath or a shower There's only one thing that could save us It's just like a shower but it's over the sink The only thing that get's washed is shiny and pink If there's a possibility of fellatio you have to make sure That your knob doesn't smell like Quavers A gentleman's wash A gentleman's wash If you think there's half a chance Your cock might get a nosh Pull your pants to one side Wash the men that they hide And that's a little gentleman's wash! The other weekend I was out on the piss When this girl who was wankered came and gave me a kiss She said "I bet you've got a big knob 'cause you've got big hands" Just like Peter Shilton But I'd come straight from footy and I thought my cock must stink So I rushed to the bogs and flopped it out in the sink I thought if I'm gonna get sucked off it's only good manners to make sure That my knob doesn't smell like Stilton A gentleman's wash A gentleman's wash If you think there's half a chance Your cock might get a nosh Pull back your skin Wash the helmet within And that's a little gentleman's Have a little gentleman's That's a little gentleman's wash!