Standing on a golf course dressed in PVC I chanced upon a golf girl selling cups of tea She asked me did I want one, asked me with a grin For thruppence you can buy one full right to the brim Well of course I had to have one – in fact I ordered three So I could watch the golf girl, could see she fancied me And later on the golf course after drinking tea It started raining golf balls and she protected me Her name was Pat And we sat under a tree She kissed me We go for walks in fine weather All together On the golf course We talk in morse Standing on a golf course dressed in PVC I chanced upon a golf girl selling cups of tea She asked me did I want one, asked me with a grin For thruppence you can buy one full right to the brim Well of course I had to have one – in fact I ordered three So I could watch the golf girl, could see she fancied me And later on the golf course after drinking tea It started raining golf balls and she protected me Her name was Pat And we sat under a tree She kissed me Let's hear it for Jeffrey, come on Thank you everybody, good night