I got no time For a co sign I would just rather my credit be better I got these bills that I can't get ahead of Live my life alone Or be dead as a debtor I sweat and I shed a Thousand tears Then bled a - river Not to give a single fuck and Live a life like I'm invincible That wasn't smart I'm paying for that But only in part Still let the principle Hang in the balance The price of my vices My anger and violence I try to contain Everyday it's a challenge To use it as ammo And stay with my talents The music to channel And start in the rage It finds a way deep in my Heart in stays So I bleed it out Every bar on the page But honestly it's Getting harder with age My old records have a lot Of things that I wouldn't say In my current state And I'm gonna pay Truth is he's unwanted by most Ruthlessly I'm being haunted by ghosts If you could see dead people Honestly though Would you just eat karma Or wanna see hope Is this what it's like At the end of a rope Past and future Suspended in both A place where your dreams End up bended and broke Woke to this fear and resentment And both Are continuing swinging On this never ending unhinging Old Pendulum woah Can I still get my own engine to go I know that every December is cold This is the road- it took its toll I fought it all from 11 years old Seems like I finally come to a halt I'm left with nothing and nowhere to go I need the faith I need the strength I'm looking deep to somewhere in my soul There's no escape I gotta face what I gotta face Question myself am I up to the task The hatred of men I'm pacing again cause I seen the snakes And I'm cutting the grass I came to far to stay stuck in the past It turned to nada Yeah nothing can last But I'm survivor And I'm coming back to scrap Till I kick the bucket at last And that's what I have That none could take Some would break I would not I could just let myself Get myself One more day Today's the one The days begun I have a shot And It's all I got I got a chance To raise my son I been redeemed In way more ways than one I had some dream And they've become Really it's been an amazing run So as I set this stage for one More time Before my days are done Walking this fateful course I just wanna say that I'm Grateful for it The faith support The hatred toward it Warriors fall down But they push forward Ever since I was 9 I pen some rhymes And I would tape record it My life has never been easy It's been a beautiful struggle I just never stop believing And I try to do what you love to Our lives will never be easy They're always a beautiful struggle I promise that you can get through it As long as you do what you love to