Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, my Isobel
Oh nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
She's my rose, my asphodel, my demoiselle, my jezebel,
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
I marvel at musicians, maestros, virtuosos, they're sensitive and deft beyond belief.
The only tune that I know well is Ring-a-Rosoes
And I can only whistle it through me teeth but good grief.
Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, my Isobel
Oh nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
I couldn't produce a tuneful decibel
Not even if I strained like hell
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
I admire a man who knows about mathematics
Who calculates and ciphers and computes.
I used to think that logarithms were things that scuttled about in attics
And surds were little flowers with square roots.
What boots it?
Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, my Isobel
Oh nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
At geometry I never excel, my triangles are parallel,
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
Some can swim for miles and dive from dizzy heights,
From deep and stormy seas they never shrink.
I am not amphibious or water tight.
My function in the water is to sink
But just think.
Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, my Isobel
Oh nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
Upon the sea the slightest swell makes me expel a hell of a yell,
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
Some men are sophisticated, gay and hearty.
Polite and poised and witty. They're such fun.
I am never welcome to a cocktail party.
I drink too much or leave my flies undone,
But thumbs up.
Nobody else is loved so well by Isobel, my Isobel
Oh nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.
I can't hold my whiskey well, and I've not got many jokes to tell
But nobody else is loved so well by ever loving Isobel,
My one and only Isobel
My little Iso-Isobel
Oh other women I repel
'Cos I can't spell and I smell as well
But nobody else is loved so well by Isobel but me.