Wi' ma hand on ma heart and ma heart in ma mooth
Wi' arms that could reach o'er the sea
Ma feet might be big, but the insects are safe
They'll never get stood on by me
(Hermless, hermless)
There's never nae bother fae me
I gang tae the library I tak' oot a book
And then I go hame for ma tea
Ah save a' the coupons that come wi' the soup
And when I have saved 53
I send awa' 50, put three in the drawer
And something gets posted tae me
(Hermless, hermless)
There's never nae bother fae me
I dae what I'm telt and I tidy ma room
And then I come doon for ma tea
There's ane or twa lads wha' ah could cry my chums
They're canny and meek as can be
There's Tam wi' his pigeons and Wull wi' his mice
And Robert McClennan and me
(Hermless, hermless)
There's never nae bother fae me
I gang tae the library, I tak' oot a book
And then I come hame for ma tea
(Hermless, hermless)
There's never nae bother fae me
Naebody'd notice that I wisnae there
If I didna come hame for ma tea
(Hermless, hermless)
There's never nae bother fae me
Naebody'd notice that I wisnae there
If I didna come hame for ma tea