A first breath inhaled Followed by curious eyes open wide Pupils dilated under artificial lights I barely had time to meet your gaze Our sighs of relief were cruelly Cut short by cries of Anguish and pain And in the turmoil she got pulled away As you and me were left behind With barely a light This scene is suspended in time You serenely asleep while my world spiraled ever Downwards I Lost count of how many nights I've kept returning to that haunted room My disassociation became fulfilled As minutes bled into hours Into an eternal horror of what might've I pray that you will never learn Just how dark those December nights were Within walls so austere and cold Cursing my own vanity, over and over again For choosing to put you on this wretched earth Time offered clarity Opened wounds slowly sealed with milk and honey And seeing you bask in the warmth of the world As you grow For now I'll just dream of being enough For now I will be enough