Ashtray on my balcony
I don't think you ever really loved me
And now I feel the same way too
But is it cliché to say
I still think about you
Cause I been thinkin' a bit about life
While cigarettes go through my lungs
Silly thoughts go through my mind
My time is running out
While I'm running around
Around stupid little thoughts
Trying to connect the dots
To lines that don't exist
I'm going through my list
Life is changing
And I don't know if I'm ready
Life is changing
I think it's gone already
Missing out on picture perfect memories
To write my pointless tragedies
About the love I never find
When I should be loving me
And I've been trying to find the words
Before they fly away like birds
Maybe I should write in French
Pour dire les choses comme je veux
100 jours sans que je dors
A cause des monstres dans mon placcard
I'm so scared of the dark
Je veux etre libre sans etre mort
Ashtray on my balcony
I know I'm still dying but at least its slowly
Trade anxiety for passion
Maybemelancholy
Will trickle through these ashes
To the ground and plant some seeds
Lush forests to a place
Grounds for imagination to sprout
Maybe one day I'll say that I made it
But for now, hopefully I make it out my basement