Ashtray on my balcony I don't think you ever really loved me And now I feel the same way too But is it cliché to say I still think about you Cause I been thinkin' a bit about life While cigarettes go through my lungs Silly thoughts go through my mind My time is running out While I'm running around Around stupid little thoughts Trying to connect the dots To lines that don't exist I'm going through my list Life is changing And I don't know if I'm ready Life is changing I think it's gone already Missing out on picture perfect memories To write my pointless tragedies About the love I never find When I should be loving me And I've been trying to find the words Before they fly away like birds Maybe I should write in French Pour dire les choses comme je veux 100 jours sans que je dors A cause des monstres dans mon placcard I'm so scared of the dark Je veux etre libre sans etre mort Ashtray on my balcony I know I'm still dying but at least its slowly Trade anxiety for passion Maybemelancholy Will trickle through these ashes To the ground and plant some seeds Lush forests to a place Grounds for imagination to sprout Maybe one day I'll say that I made it But for now, hopefully I make it out my basement