Now ladies and gentlemen, we bring to the floor
The young lady that recorded the record
That was so dirty, so rough
This record was so rough that you wouldn't even
Let your own mother-in-law listen to it
This was the type of record that you would take in the toilet and play it
Take two rolls of toilet tissue with you
So you can wipe out what you don't like
So with a big round of a applause let me bring you to the floor
Now it is none other than the queen of comedy, LaWanda!
♪
Now my text this evening, brothers and sisters
Is about Adam and Eve (amen)
Now we all know about Adam and Eve
Now Adam was the first man and Eve was his wife
And they lived in a garden, and they led a happy life
Now how many y'all out there leadin' a happy life tonight?
It ain't too many out there leadin' a happy life (amen)
'Cause when you can't get them food stamps
And your belly hungry, you ain't happy
I ain't never seen a hungry happy motherfucker
But Adam, he ate of the apple and so they couldn't remain
So they moved to a garden and they start a-raisin' Cain
Yes brothers and sisters, they moved to the garden and they start a-raisin' Cain
Yes brothers and sisters I'ma tell it like it TI is
Yes brothers and sisters you know when you get out there
In the suburbs, that's out in the country ya'know
Ain't nothin' out there but the birds and the bees and the weeds
All you gotta do is listen to the birds and smoke the weed!
Can I get an amen for the weed? (Amen)
Damn right, I'ma tell it like it TI is, brothers and sisters
Damn right, now Adam had two sons who didn't quite agree (right on)
And the psychiatrists they confirmed that, and said it was just brotherly
Now you know how it is, brothers and sisters
When two brothers and sisters get to fightin'
And motherfuckers fight to kill! Damn right
Honey they go at your ass with blood!
You'd better damn believe it baby
And they don't fight like they fightin' a stranger
Honey they fight to kill, baby
Yeah, baby, and they said it was brotherly
But that's a damn shame when two brothers get to fightin'
But I'm gon' tell it like it is
Now one day Cain got angry and somehow lost his head
And he took out his coat revolver and he shot Able full o' lead
A dirty motherfucker!
Shot his brother down in cold blood!