Well I staggered in one night fearin' for my life But the mood was just right for a kiss She sat straight up in bed swingin' at my head And she said I'd be tastin' more than this So that's what they call what you get She'll forgive and forget but first you'll regret It's the ten pound ear hole It's the ten pound ear hole The riot act is what you'll be read You'd rather have a slap upside the head So spare me your whole life story At least we'll get home with the glory I went down to the local to get my fill Over two three I did linger A long winded clown laid his filibuster down With a boast and a toast and a bender I suggested he clam up he thought I said stand up And that was the last I remember It's the ten pound ear hole It's the ten pound ear hole The chapter and verse is what you'll be fed You'd rather have a slap upside the head So spare me your whole life story At least we'll get home with the glory Well I got my courage up I'm not sure for what And I made my way to confession He said come right in I said father I have sinned But I swear that I've learned my lesson Then he read it all to me and said pray the rosary A hundred times in succession It's the ten pound ear hole It's the ten pound ear hole The chapter and verse is what you'll be fed You'd rather have a slap upside the head So spare me your whole life story At least we'll get home with the glory