When I wear my gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
All the ladies want to flirt
They want to flirt
And if they're squirters, then they squirt
Cause everyone loves me
In my gayest shirt
Everyone loves my
Shirt
I got it on a fabled Christmas several years ago
I guess they never loved me, it was uncle Bill and tia Flo
Begrudging smile I was showing as I kindly took their pittance
Sure, it might have fit, but I could have done without the sequins
So yeah
I put it on because I don't aim to offend
But this apparel is improper in the company of men
They call the color salmon, it has ruffles and a trail
Red embroidered kangaroos with red poofs on every tail
But suddenly I put it on, I'm walking down the street
Ladies seem to come right up and finally take a note of me
So I guess I gotta show some love for this atrocious thing
Because when I don my gayest shirt I feel like I'm the king king king
When I wear my gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
All the ladies want to flirt
They want to flirt
And if they're squirters, then they squirt
Cause everyone loves me
In my gayest shirt
Everyone loves my
Shirt
I tried to hide it underneath some socks and underpants
But the shirt's the key to my romance
It puts the ladies in a trance
They can't help but feel on the fabric
Can't help but feel on the Beef
They're digging all the glitter
Ruffles, green and pink motif, believe
That if I could get a girly without this eyesore
I'd stick it in my desk drawer and burn that mother to the floor
Shoot the ashes with a shotgun, maybe sacrifice a loved one
Rocket it into the sun just to make sure the job is done uh
So what is it about this silly means of dress?
That is making Beefy studly and the ladies all obsessed?
But who am I to question such a great miraculous plan
From whatever deity that chose to make Beefy the god damn man
When I wear my gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
All the ladies want to flirt
They want to flirt
And if they're squirters, then they squirt
Cause everyone loves me
In my gayest shirt
Everyone loves my
Shirt
It got a flame stripe, running down the side and the back
And The Lord of the Rings printed on the ass crack
Makes me feel like a nerd in it
That's my werd in it
So off-brand that you ain't even
Heard of it
But so what?
This shirt is making me glad, like its adjective moniker
Antonym sad
Cause when the girls
See the shirt
And the shirt's
On the beef
They cannot
Get enough
Of the man
Underneath
When I wear my gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
All the ladies want to flirt
They want to flirt
And if they're squirters, then they squirt
When I wear my gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
My gayest shirt
All the ladies want to flirt
They want to flirt
And if they're squirters, then they squirt, yeah