What's wrong?
(Why the long)
Face on
(Come along)
The wait is gone
(We've got a song)
Hey, come on
(Sing along)
Problems
(You've got 'em)
Throbbing in your noggin
(Gotta walk 'em off)
We'll talk about 'em
(Before you hit rock bottom)
Do the laundry
(Stick a thistle)
Big dilemma
(In a pickle)
Take a walk
(Start the pace)
Between a rock
(And a hard place)
On a wire
(SNAFU)
Quagmire
(Catch-22)
Sick and tired
(Feeling blue)
It's dire
(What you gonna do)
Hide inside
(Freakin' out)
Hide inside
(Freakin' out)
Sweating bullets
(Stressin' hard)
Flip a coin
(Hit the card)
Roll the dice
(Pawn star)
Shake the 8-
(Ball and pod)
Don't you go
(And hurt yourself)
Take a breath
(We're here to help)
You could use some good advice
(We'll talk you through and do it twice)
Just because we're mighty nice
(The two of us, twice the vice)
Welcome to the payment plan
(But first I've gotta shake your hand)
For truly I'm a faithful fan
(You're a Popeye the Sailor Man)
I'm the devil on your shoulder
(He's an evil doer soldier)
Like I told ya
(I'm the other devil on your other shoulder)
An enabler
(Facilitator)
Big mistake maker
(I'm the devil)
I'm the other devil
(On your shoulder)
On your other shoulder
(I'm the devil on your shoulder)
He's an evil doer soldier
(Like I told ya)
I'm the other devil on your other shoulder
(An enabler)
Facilitator
(Big mistake maker)
I'm the devil
(I'm the other devil)
On your shoulder
(On your other shoulder)
Now, wake up! Did you get ejected from the Navy, son?
Fuck it! Come with me and drown your sorrows in some Jameson.
(Wait a minute! Booze ain't gonna help chase the pain away.
Stay away from him and have a seat. Try this Cabernet.)
Fuck that! Let's get high on hard drugs. What's your type?
I've always wondered you're smoking in your ever-present pipe.
(Just say no to drugs You need a hug. Now, come with me a sec.
Stop. Take a breath. Great! Now take a Percocet.)
Sailing on the open sea? Let's stage a mutiny.
Cast your shipmates overboard; your only crew is you and me.
(I disagree. You should sneak tonight while the crew is fast asleep
Free the life boats, let them drift out to sea.)
On shore leave, surely, you needn't give Olive a call.
Find a port and some hookers. Line 'em up and bang 'em all.
(Olive is your only woman. Don't you dare betray her.
Take a walk to the dock and fuck a bunch of sailors.)
You know that dude named "Wimpy"?
That pussy you let hang around has abused your kindness too long.
It's time that you beat him down.
(It would hardly be a fair fight, wouldn't you say?
Don't you beat him up today; you should do it Tuesday.)
It sickens me to see you eat that spinach.
Here, I've got some greasy cheesy fries for you to finish.
(Those won't make you strong; fatty foods you should avoid.
Have some leafy greens; you can chase them with these steroids.)
I'm the devil on your shoulder
(He's an evil doer soldier)
Like I told ya
(I'm the other devil on your other shoulder)
An enabler
(Facilitator)
Big mistake maker
(I'm the devil)
I'm the other devil
(On your shoulder)
On your other shoulder
(I'm the devil on your shoulder)
He's an evil doer soldier
(Like I told ya)
I'm the other devil on your other shoulder
(An enabler)
Facilitator
(Big mistake maker)
I'm the devil
(I'm the other devil)
On your shoulder
(On your other shoulder)
Now, you know that your beau a true foe named Bluto
Should you go and kill him off you'd be better off with you know
(Oh, no! Don't go and murder him that's no punishment.
Torture would be so much more relevant.)
But he's moving in on Olive and I think she kinda likes it.
Nip it in the butt, spill the blood. Don't try to fight it.
(You think she'd learn a lesson? I'm guessing, "Hell no!"
Instead, go fuck her sister; send her pictures from your cell phone.)
Sweetpea's crying. I can see it's got you bothered.
Shut him up rub-a-dub in the tub under water.
(Popeye, stop! My God! He's just a child.
Float him down the river; they did it in the bible.)
God is of no relevance -- you're on another level.
The answers that you seek are found worshiping the devil.
(That devil won't level with your salvation.
Can only be obtained by proclaiming "Hail Satan!")
Now you're smiling
(Styling)
While you're
(Profiling)
You're flying
(High 'n')
Someone you've been shining
(Sex sprained)
Heart strained
(Bell is rained)
Everything
(You're smokin' up)
Take a chug
(The world's your oyster)
Fill it up
So glad I could help you out
So glad that I could ease your jawe
I suggested a better plan
He took my advice, my man.
I'm the one he told it to
I'm the one he listened to
Who are you?
Who are you?
Who are you?
That's your cue