My wife came in this morning from Texas down the line In the Big Grand Central Station, the clock was striking nine She rode the Southwest Limited on the New York Central road She chartered 16 coaches, and brought the kids along We rode the bus and subways all over New York Town To rent us an apartment and think about settling down The trains run through the buildings and also underground And you spend another nickel every time you turn around ♪ The subway trains are crowded and when they make a stop You're at the wrong derm station, and you push the fire Cop They even push and squeeze and squirm, they slip and slide and crowd And when your station comes along, it seems you can't get out We hooked a train and rode an hour to see the Bronx Park Zoo And landed out in Brooklyn on Utica Avenue You got to change your subway train at every stop or so And every time I come out wearing a different set of clothes ♪ We loaded in a taxi cab to haul us 'cross the town It registered up a nickel every time the wheel went 'round He charged us 11 dollars and 87 cent And down in Texas, that's enough to pay six months of rent Now friend, if you are from the South or either way out West And you got a wife and children that you love your very best If you come to New York City from American's plane of view You'd better bring a wagon load of greenback dollar bills