Mardi Gras came and went
All my money has been spent
How am I gonna pay the rent?
Sitting on my ass (sitting on your face)
Who mistook the steak for chicken?
Who am I gonna stick my dick in?
We're not those kids
Sitting on the couch
My former life I had a sister (my former life I was a high roller)
I abused her and I dissed her (dropped my kids in the diamond stroller)
She got swept up in a twister (found my calling as a part-time bowler)
First I laughed, and then I missed her (treated my wife for a new three-holer)
Who mistook these baths for showers?
Who fucked up that Leaning Tower?
We're not those kids
Sitting on the couch
Oh, get on a Greyhound and ride away
Different dreams than yesterday (live on birthday cake each day)
Tell your grandmas they're okay (tell your grandparents that they're gay)
Kiss their cheek and run away (steal their money and run away)
'Cause me and my friends are so smart
We invented this new kind of darts (we invented this new kind of art)
Hit a bull's-eye and cut a fart (post-modernist, throwing darts)
Smoking crack and cutting crack
Who missed that thing on the ceiling? (Who mistook this crap for genius?)
Who is gonna hurt my feelings? (Who is gonna stroke my penis?)
We're not those kids
Sitting on the couch
Even your mother is a crook (oh, people are shiny like a brand-new book)
But if you get a closer look
There's shit on every road you took (there's shit on every hand you shook)
If you don't believe me, read your book (if you don't believe me, look at your hand)
Somebody's making a killing (so who made all these things for killing?)
Whose empty heart needs filling? (Whose pussy hole needs filling?)
We're not those kids
Sitting on the couch
Who mistook the steak for chicken?
Who am I gonna stick my dick in?
We're not those kids
Sitting on the couch
Sitting on the couch
Sitting on the couch
Sitting on the couch