There are a lot of things in life I'd like to experience But this is definitely not one of them It may sound stupid when I bitch 'cause it's so small But at least I've got a lot of Vicodin I woke up one morning, there was a lot of blood in my pee There's nothing to fix it you've just gotta let it be It was really pissed off and wanted to be set free Yeah, the giant fucking stone in my kidney So I went to the doctor and peed in a cup She said, "There's a lot of blood in there and that's not cool." I said, "Really? No shit, bitch. That's all you've got? You should get your money back for those 12 years of school." The next day I went and got a CAT scan The nurse lady really liked my hair The results were in and the doctor said, "Guess what, Kelly? Got a giant kidney stone floating around in there." I woke up one morning, there was a lot of blood in my pee There's nothing to fix it you've just gotta let it be Now there's only one thing that I seem to always hear You should probably drink more water and drink less beer