I walk into a Chinese restaurant and can't get cheese They ask me to order something else please But this is America I demand my cheese In a Chinese restaurant I do as I please The Chinese eat no cheese They think we smell like shit Everybody must have cheese Still the Chinese don't believe So I took my problem and I went overseas To the land of the giant jingo-Japanese But I couldn't get enough ice in my Coke My world fell apart! The Chinese eat no cheese They think we smell like shit Why the hell won't they eat our cheese I challenge 10, 000 centuries! So I took my problem and I went to Mars I stumbled round all the crummy downtown bars But I couldn't get enough dicks in my butt My ass fell apart! The Chinese eat no cheese They think we smell like shit Why the hell won't they eat our cheese We challenge 10, 000 centuries! Well I walk into a Chinese restaurant And I ordered a lamb Prepared in a way that is dear To the folk of Iran I begged and pleaded My entreaty went unheeded My mission it took place in a pan The cheese of the Jesus It deforms the fetus The turd of a Western man... The Chinese eat no cheese They think we smell like shit Everybody must have cheese Still the Chinese don't believe! The Chinese eat no cheese The Chinese eat no cheese The Chinese eat no cheese The Chinese eat no cheese They're inscrutable They're unstoppable Nice complexions No pimples pop-able What about Crab Rangoon?